TOP 5 BREAKFAST CEREALS TO EAT WHEN YOU'RE HIGH

by Prettywasted.com

If you're anything like me, you've got  an abundant supply of different kind of breakfast cereals in your secret munchie closet. These are the TOP 5 Breakfast Cereals of all time, hands down, no arguments.

In order of least favorite to most favorite, here are my choices for The Top Best Cereals When You're High.

Kellogg's Frosted Flakes. They're GR-R-REAT!

Frosted Flakes by Kellogg's have been around as long as I can remember.Except for the colorful exterior of he box, the cereal is a bore. On it's own, it's sweeter than a diabetic vagina. Add iced cold milk and you've created one of the top 5 stoner treats. The colder the milk, the better.

Pros: Sugar Rush turns you into a tiger.

Cons: Loses its erection in milk, you'll rot your teeth if you eat them out of the box.

Best add on: Strawberries

Trix are for kids....and stoned adults

Trix by General Mills are another old school favorite, They were just round circles when I was a kid.They only had llke 4 flavors Now they're all different shapes and colors and stuff, I get fucking confused easily, Why is General Mills fucking with me? I had to quickly pour the cereal and milk into a bowl before i had a multi color seizure and passed out.

Pros: Taste is top notch. Not easy to stop after one bowl. This box had some cool assed puzzle on the back.

Cons: Turns your poop bright green for a few days afterward.

Prizes: I think my wife stole it out of the box to fuck with me.

Fun Factor: There was a pretty cool puzzle on the back of mine.

Capn' Crunch by Quaker: Every stoner in the world has eaten Capn' Crunch. In fact, you're not a real stoner unless you have a nice big yellow box of the Capn's famous delicious golden tiny treasure chests. BUT-You must have have Capn' Crunch with Crunchberries, or it doesn't count. You can buy Capn' Crunch plain (which is plain old fucking boring) or the utterly disgusting Peanut Butter blend, but true stoners ALWAYS buy Crunchberries. Case fucking closed.

Pros: It's Capn' Crunch. What's not to like? When I was a kid, there were only red Crunchberries. Now there's a zillion colors. A true eye candy treat for the marijuana enthusiast.

Cons: You'll probably have to share it with your baby brother.

Fun Factor: The Capn' looks like he's fucking baked all the time.

Count Chocula by General Mills: General Mills cereals are fucking awesome. That's why the guy is a fucking general. Count Chocula is close to being the most perfect food on the planet. Chocolate and fucking marshmallow. The only thing that could make it better would be bacon. This is a fucking awesome cereal and if the person who invented it is still alive, they should get some sort of lifetime achievement award.

Pros: Count Chocula stays pretty crunchy in the milk. I think that's because it never stays in the bowl very long.

Cons: No wussy Twilight vampires here. Count Chocula is old school vampire and could kick Edward and Jacob's asses all over Transylvania.

Lucky Charms by General Mills: This shit is THE SHIT!  They're fucking magically delicious This is stoner nirvana. If you got something against these sweetened, tasty oat morsel and marshmallow cereal, please leave this site immediately. I don't want you here any longer. Lucky Charms is hands down the best stoner breakfast treat on the planet. Fuck you, Wheatabix!

Pros: It's Lucky Charms, bitch!

Cons: There are no cons. If Lucky Charms were a female body part, it would be a vagina.

Fun Factor: If you buy Lucky Charms, everyone knows you get high. If you buy Lucky Charms after 1am, everyone knows you're high right now!

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